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‘Selfish, Shallow, and Self-Absorbed: Sixteen Writers on the Decision Not to Have Kids’

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By Kate Bolick Today 19 percent of American women reach their mid-40s without ever having a child — a figure that has nearly doubled in four decades, a truly staggering statistic. The sheer velocity of its emergence suggests a unity of intent, as if an army of Gen Xers came of age razing day care centers and burning diapers, and continues to march steadily into the future, attracting new recruits by the minute. I suspect even these ostensible trailblazers wish it were that straightforward. A 2012 Centers for Disease Control report shows that among women in the 40-44 age bracket — the final reckoning, according to such surveys — 22 percent were “childless by choice,” compared with 35 percent who felt they didn’t have any say in the matter. Far from being a unified front, this growing demographic tilts toward women who had a wish about how their lives would turn out that didn’t come true. The mystery of whether this wish is a personal urge, a biological imperative or the uncon